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Letting Go

Letting go can be a challenge for most parents. When faced with a life-threatening allergy, it feels safer to protect your child by utterly managing his/her life. But, teaching a child about her allergy, and how to take responsibility for it, is an important step in creating a capable and functional adult. From the outset, children need to understand their allergies and treatment in case of an emergency. Here are a few guidelines…

  • Try to maintain a matter-of-fact demeanor. “Avoid talking about your child's allergies as if the child is not present, and be careful how you present the dangers of your child's food allergy to others.”*
  • Young children can be taught with pictures. Create a scrapbook or flashcards depicting safe and not safe foods with photos cut from packaging and magazines.
  • From an early age, start to teach your child the importance of asking questions about food, of not accepting food from anyone other than Mom or Dad, of being a careful label reader, and how to identify offending foods.
  • Use accurate words for safe food substitutions to avoid confusion. For example, say “soy milk” not just “milk”
  • Show your child her safe shelf in the pantry and refrigerator
  • Develop a list of foods that are most likely to be served at daycare or school, and explain what is safe and not-safe.
  • Identify high-risk foods, like cookies and muffins. Prepare these foods at home, so your child has the opportunity to have them in a safe environment. This teaches the child that he or she isn't being denied foods, but instead is simply avoiding risky situations.
  • Help your child learn how to politely, but firmly, refuse to eat certain foods. Emphasize that he or she must always think about his or her food allergies. Explain that there will always be people that don't “get it”, so it's up to your child to take responsibility for avoiding risky foods.
  • Teach your child how to recognize a reaction.
  • Insist your child never leaves the house without an EpiPen® and Benadryl. Waistpacks (see EpiPen® carriers) are a popular way to ensure safety for young children.

Excerpt from “Letting Go: Teaching a Child Responsibility,” by Anne Munoz-Furlong